And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so?
It came without ribbons. It came without tags.
It came without packages, boxes or bags.
And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before.
What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store?
What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more?
— Dr. Seuss
If you build a better mousetrap,
you will catch better mice.
– George Gobel
Statistical advice was integral to the initial experimental design, but we decided the advice led to too much work.
– David C Logan @angerstusson
Selected to use open data for analysis because we didn’t manage to negotiate access to potentially more useful sources.
A Northern blot was run instead of realtime QPCR because the PI is old and does not trust results unless he sees a band.
– Adriana Heguy @AdrianaHeguy
Continue reading The Secret Of Scientific Research – What They (Normally) Don’t Tell You
How doth the little crocodile
Improve his shining tail,
And pour the waters of the Nile
On every golden scale!
.
How cheerfully he seems to grin
How neatly spreads his claws,
And welcomes little fishes in,
With gently smiling jaws!
– Lewis Carroll
Dear Friends.
as usual our family has enjoyed an eventful year, and we’d like to share our news with you all.
As some of you already know, our house was repossessed earlier in the year, due to an unfortunate misunderstanding with the tax authorities. Happily we’ve found the perfect little family home, and we’re currently parked just 3 miles up the North Road. Grant attached it to a power line with his usual technical skill. Later in the year he was fired from his job, but not before he got hold of some choice bits of information on several members of the board. We are looking forward to a comfortable retirement in the near future.
Our pride and joy Sharon failed the entrance exam to the new school, but with her usual courage she’s decided to soldier on and try again next year. Her charming new boyfriend Dwight is very successful in the pharmaceutical line, so let us know if you need anything. Our dear son Steven was arrested (his first time!!!), but we’re confident he will get off on a technicality.
After our move, Rover went missing, though we believe he may still be in the area. We have heard of a number of chickens disappearing, and he always did love chicken. Ginger on the other hand is thriving – and providing us with regular fresh meat: the local butcher has a cat-flap.
As for me, I’ve got my little flask, and am fine as always.
We wish you all a Merry Christmas and an equally successful 2013.
Donna + Grant + Sharon + Steven + Rover + Ginger
A foolish young boy for a dare
Crept into the lair of a bear.
The bear, tired of meats,
Took the boy’s bag of sweets:
Bah, humbug! – the mints made him swear.
˜
The bear held its cheek in regret
For its tooth badly needed a vet.
Not-a-one who would dare
Pull the tooth of a bear:
So don’t try keeping one as a pet.
˜
Now the boy thought he knew just the thing:
Tied the tooth, closed the door with a swing.
The bear was relieved,
The boy was reprieved.
And the bear slumbered on until spring.
* * *
This week’s 100wcgu: Bah, Humbug!
Wishing you all a Very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali.
He was using a dotted line.
He caught every other fish.
– Steven Wright
In the past weeks, I’ve seen many beautiful photos of trees in blazing red or gold and I was the tiniest bit envious, as the autumn colours here didn’t seem half as glorious. But suddenly I realised: our trees are pointillists!
Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics.
I can assure you mine are still greater.
– Albert Einstein
Olaf joined me on an I.T. project in Stockholm as MSE, or moral support elk. The photo shows him hard at work. He doesn’t come from Sweden, but enjoyed working there immensely. The people, the culture, the climate: he felt right at home. He even started looking out for a position with the local office.
On-site in October, he suddenly realised they turn the lights out in winter, and decided to retire to the South.
Below you see Olaf studying Swedish, as he still loves Sweden, and hopes to go there on holiday soon – in the summer, of course. He feels quite protective of all things Swedish: even if he’s not really from there, he feels being an “Älg” makes him belong!
Olaf says Hi to everyone, especially those afflicted with I.T. projects, and of course: Hälsningar!
This Week’s Photo Challenge: Mine.
I am told that I talk in shorthand
and then smudge it.
– J.R.R. Tolkien
The clouds really looked blurred even to the eye.
Subject: Ticket n° 773342259
Dear Ms. Barrow,
thank-you for calling the automated IDEAL service hotline.
Your call was received: 13.09.2012 10:44
Your ticket n°: 773342259
Your issue: “Email not working“.
We want to start working on your ticket as soon as possible: please release the ticket by clicking THIS LINK, or calling the hotline again and stating your ticket number.
We enjoy helping you!
IDEAL Service Team.
“Guest post” inspired by the DPChallenge.
I was approached by young Bertie – ablogdog, which as he kindly explains is not his name, but his you-are-well. Whether this denotes his breed or his profession I cannot say, or perhaps it is a passphrase to some secret domain? Anyway, I was invited to spread my metaphorical wings and broadcast my opinions in this new arena, the blogosphere. B-logo-sphere, a second domain of rationality it seems, or of discourse at any rate. Ever ready to try a new way of giving others the benefit of my superior, I fastened my seat-belt and climbed in the roller coaster of bloggings and twitterings – well, possibly in reverse order.
The new birdsongs are truly delightful, one can only deplore that they come too late. What would the scholar not give to read Archimedes’ “I’m in the bath.”, Newton’s “Would you believe it, an apple just hit me on the head!”, and Edison’s laconic “Making tea.” Whether my new young friends’ “I’m on the train” will prove equally valuable, is not for me to say.
On the blogging front, I am sadly forced to confess failure. I feel entitled to plead attenuating circumstances as I was distracted by the hand of fate. It transported me with a simple click, as if by magic, into the domain of a man named Ted. A loquacious chap, the unanimous verdict on whom seems to be “Ted talks”, otherwise I believe him to be a perfectly fluffy fellow with a catalogue of highly entertaining and enlightening expositions.
Ted’s genius is demonstrated by the fact that all the gems in his collection are brief; one even bespeaks the ability to present any idea in only six words. What progress could humanity make, or the humanities at any rate, if books and essays were strictly proscribed from exceeding a six word limit? One could easily do a whole term’s marking in a leisured forenoon, and take the rest of term off. I would suddenly have enough shelf space for my collection of stuffed owls, though, admittedly, it might be hard to convince publishers you were extensively revising word three.
The following abridgments alone will make space for the espresso machine I intend to buy with today’s profits.
If you have been, how very kind.
This winter I discovered a new kind of evergreen tree! Or maybe these trees have an enthusiastic knitter in the family?
Guess what’s wrong with this picture? No, it’s not Bertie. Try again.
If a cluttered desk
is the sign of a cluttered mind,
what is the significance
of a clean desk?
– Laurence J. Peter
Manuel de la photo ratée – Thomas Lélu.
Hilarious guide to a wide variety of creative ways to botch your photos. For every way, and various combinations, the author provides examples from his family album, as well as detailed instructions on how to create each particular effect. As a bonus he delivers an artistic critique of each type of photo.
In the technical part of the book we encounter such old favourites as fuzzy, over- / underexposed or ill-framed photos – including the popular road-photo, but also highlights such as the thumb-snap or the discoloured photo.
The more challenging chapters on subject matter provide insight into how to create empty, crowded or confused photos. A dedicated chapter explains how to ruin portraits. My particular favourites are the photo-triste (sad) and photo-camouflage.
While I cannot claim to be a master of the botched photo, I consider myself a gifted amateur, and humbly present my own examples for a select few of these techniques, in particular of my own specialty, the fuzzy photo. With a minimum of practice, I’m sure you too will be able to produce such results.
Of course – despite all my best efforts – I sometimes produce photos that have a discernible subject in the frame that is in focus and properly lit.
Nobody is perfect.
(Click on image for carousel view.)
The innocent
and the beautiful
Have no enemy
but time.
– William Butler Yeats
I never saw a purple cow,
I never hope to see one,
But I can tell you anyhow,
I’d rather see than be one.
– Frank Gellett Burgess
One of my nonsense favourites.
Switzerland is a small steep country,
Much more up and down than sideways.
– Ernest Hemingway
Mountains are fine, but have you ever asked yourself how big Switzerland would be if you ironed it flat? Happy Swiss national day!
Upon a pane a snail did wander
The airy, lofty view to ponder
And after quite a lengthy stay
It went sedately on its way.
In philosophy,
if you aren’t moving at a snail’s pace
you aren’t moving at all.
– Iris Murdoch
There was an old lady who lived in a shoe
But her sister’s tale, do you know that too?
A charming old lady she was and so free
Towards all and sundry with biscuits and tea.
You might call her eccentric: believe it or not
She so loved her tea that she lived in a pot.
But take foibles too far, and there’s danger about
When you see what it is, it is too late to shout.
For one day when the water was boiling and hot
She forgot to go out, so she stewed in the pot.
Did you know birds went in for numbered houses nowadays?
And have you seen the flying houses by Laurent Chehere?
Ever been tempted to spray paint the walls? Well now you can.
And of course, I couldn’t resist.
I never really figured out what this was…
Another cute online painting tool: the fluid painter by Peter Blaskovic. Have a go!
I don’t like painting eggs, I want to go home,
Said the girl with the curls to the little blue gnome.
But I need these eggs painted, the gnome wept its plea.
If they’re not done tomorrow, I’ll never be free!
There are too many eggs, there’s no way we can paint
them all by tomorrow! The gnome fell in faint.
But the girl didn’t panic, she knew just what to do,
She called to her friend, with thing one and thing two.
With little cats A – Z and the voom
Hat-cat got those eggs painted, and lifted the gloom.
Once in the vein of nonsense verse, I couldn’t resist this Dr Seussish prompt in the current round of 100wcgu.
Stray Thoughts 